Vince McMahon was sitting in his office at Titan Towers in Stamford, CT, going over annual expense reports for WWE.
"Not bad", he thought. "House show attendence is steady and the tour of Mexico is bringing in some great numbers. I'll have to make sure to give myself a big bonus for that."
He continued to read the reports.
"Ratings on RAW and Smackdown have dropped a slight bit. I'll have to cut someone's pay to make up the loss."
Vince reached over and hit the intercom on his desk to speak to his secretary.
"Janice, I need a list of the talent roster and their salaries. And the creative team too."
"Right away, Mr. McMahon", the secretary replied.
Vince went back to reading the reports when there was a tap at his door.
"Come in", Vince said.
"Here are the salary lists you asked for, Mr. McMahon", Janice said. "And sir, your daughter, Stephanie, is on her way over from her office, wishing to see you. What should I tell her?"
"Does she already know I'm here in the office?", Vince asked.
"Yes sir", Janice said. "She saw your car in the parking lot and knows you're here."
"Damn!", Vince sighed. "Well, when she gets here, send her in."
Vince reached into his desk drawer and pulled out a bottle of Tylenol.
"I'd better take several", he sighed as he opened the bottle. "When Steph is here this late in the evening, it's never pleasant."
Vince swallowed a handful of the pills, washing them down with a bottle of water as a knock came on his door.
"Just in time", Vince thought to himself as he put the bottle back in his desk. "Come in", he said loudly towards the door.
The door opened and in stepped Stephanie McMahon Helmsley.
"Hi Daddy", she screeched as she leaned over and gave her father a kiss on the cheek.
"Hello Princess", Vince smiled weakly. "So what brings you up here to my office this late in the evening? We didn't have a meeting scheduled, did we?"
"No Daddy, we don't have any meetings scheduled until Thursday for the outlining of the shows next week."
"So what's up?", Vince asked.
"I have a few ideas to get your opinion on", Stephanie smiled.
"Why?", Vince said. "No offense, Pum'kin, but your ideas usually suck!"
"Daddy?", Steph said, with a surprised and shocked expression on her face.
"Just being honest, sweetheart", Vince said.
"Oh well", Steph sighed. "Maybe some of my other ideas weren't perfect, but you've made some mistakes yourself."
"I'm Vince McMahon", Vince said. "I don't make mistakes!"
"The XFL, the WBF, WWF New York, the video where you sang the song and danced, buying Georgia wrestling, letting Hall & Nash go to WCW, Montreal, Spike TV, hiring Mark and Rena Mero, taking the title off Christian last week...", Stephanie noted.
"Okay, so maybe I made a few mistakes here and there", Vince said.
"I was just getting warmed up", Stephanie smiled.
"What are your ideas, Steph?", Vince sighed.
"Before I start, how did your meeting with Donald go about taking over The Apprentice if he decides to run for President?", Steph asked.
"He's not running for President and he's not leaving Apprentice", Vince laughed. "Donald is just milking the press and my sources at NBC told me that almost immediately after I left his office, he was calling to begin discussions of renewal for his show."
"So he's just being Donald", Steph laughed.
"Exactly", Vince smiled. "And the look on his face when I showed him that video we had prepared, with a full cast and everything... it was priceless."
"So how many of your celebrities do you think he's contacted by now about appearing on his show?", Steph asked.
"I'm not sure", Vince smirked. "But if he hasn't contacted any of them yet, he will. You can be sure of that."
"So that means no WWE Celebrity Apprentice for now", Steph said.
"We may come up with a version of it for the internet to nudge and mock Donald a bit, but no full production or show. No!", Vince said.
"Well, that one might be out, but back to my ideas. I was having dinner with Trish the other night and we were talking about the great numbers that Tough Enough has been pulling in."
"The ratings have been great", Vince agreed. "Bringing Steve back to host the show and using Trish, Booker and DeMott as the trainers was a stroke of genius."
"You are a genius, Daddy", Steph agreed.
"I know", Vince laughed.
"Well, I was thinking about how successful Tough Enough has been and I started to think, what if we take it to the next level with another version... a Celebrity version."
"What?", Vince asked.
"Think about it?", Steph said. "Just like the regular Tough Enough, but we get eight or ten celebrities to train and learn in that ring with our WWE trainers and the winner could get a WWE contract."
"Didn't Hogan and Eric do a show like this a couple of years ago?", Vince asked.
"They might have", Steph said, "but that's Terry and Eric's version. We're the WWE. We do it with bigger names, better production values and just all around better. And then we could really rub it in Terry and Eric's faces."
"That might be fun", Vince said. "That's not a bad idea actually. Have an official proposal drawn up outlining the show and who we could possibly get as trainers and participants and have it sent to me so I can present the idea at the next Board of Directors meeting."
"Why bother with the Board?", Steph asked. "You never listen to them anyway."
"Well, I don't want them to feel totally ignored", Vince answered. "Besides, while they're discussing this, I can sneak in more bonuses for our family."
"I'll have it to you in a couple of days, Daddy", Steph smiled.
"Anything else?", Vince asked.
"Well, we've got some ideas and suggestions that have been given to me by others and left on my desk", Steph said.
"Well, what are they?", Vince asked.
"Here's another reality show idea that was presented to me by Roddy when we were in California last week", Steph said.
"From Piper?", Vince asked. "This should be interesting. What is it?"
"Several former WWE stars from the eighties and early nineties are put together in a house, like Big Brother or the Real World. And they interact and perform challenges. And the WWE Universe gets to vote on eliminations each week and the last remaining old-timer gets featured in an A-level storyline on RAW or Smackdown", Steph said.
"I think Roddy just wants one more run", Vince said. "I'm not so sure about that one."
"Well, he also had an additional idea with a season of NXT having the rookies being mentored by former WWE stars and legends from the past", Steph said.
"Don't we already have that idea in the works?", Vince asked.
"Actually, that was the plan for this past season of NXT, but we didn't want it to be overshadowed by the return of Tough Enough", Steph said.
"I'm not crazy about the first idea and the second one is already in play so have someone send Roddy a letter saying thanks, but no thanks. Is there anything else?"
"Well, we've got a letter from Jimmy Hart wanting to put together a reality series about the making of a WWE themed CD set - with him and David Wolff as the producers of the album and WWE superstars recording and peforming original songs and the entire process being filmed", Steph noted.
"That's interesting", Vince said. "Make a note of it and I'll call Jimmy next week when we're down in Memphis."
"Done", Steph smiled. "And one last thing."
"What is it?", Vince asked.
"Well, I'm not sure if it's a joke or not. It's from Chris Jericho and well...", Steph started to say.
"From Chris? Is he still doing that dancing show?", Vince asked.
"No, he was voted off two weeks ago", Steph said.
"Too bad", Vince said. "So what's his idea?"
"It's actually an idea for a movie. He wants to see if WWE Films could do a remake of the movie, Police Academy."
"Police Academy? I loved those movies", Vince snickered. "Especially the one with Billie Bird and the civilians being cops."
"That was number four... Citizens on Patrol", Steph said.
"Oh yeah", Vince laughed. "But how did you know that, Pum'kin?"
"Hunter picked the movies last weekend for our movie night", Steph sighed. "We watched all of the Police Academy movies from one though seven."
"Why didn't you invite me?", Vince asked.
"Next time, you're invited. Then maybe I won't have to watch that crap!", Steph sighed.
"That's classic American culture", Vince sighed.
"No, that's brain-dead, tasteless garbage", Steph said. "Hunter was making so much noise laughing at those stupid movies, I couldn't even listen to my new Paris Hilton
"You listen to Paris Hilton sing?", Vince asked.
"I love Paris", Steph smiled.
"But you think the Police Academy movies are stupid? The irony in that statement just amazes me", Vince said.
"What irony, Daddy", Steph asked innocently.
"Never mind, Princess", Vince smiled. "What about Chris and the movie?"
"Chris is suggesting doing a remake of the film using WWE Superstars in all the major roles", Steph said.
"An ensemble comedy using the WWE Universe", Vince said. "That would attract viewers and give us some great publicity and could possibly make some money."
"The only people who would watch a movie like that are men and...", Steph started to say, but Vince cut her off.
"The main WWE audience", he said with a big smile. "The same core audience for a WWE event are the same people who would watch a quirky comedy starring WWE Superstars. I love it!"
"I love it too, Daddy", Steph said, rolling her eyes.
"Call Chris and have him write up an official presentation of that idea and send it to me", Vince said. "And tell him I'm sorry about the dancing show."
"I'll do that, Daddy", Steph said.
"Well, anything else?", Vince asked
"That's it for now, Daddy", Steph said, standing up.
"Well, those are actually some good ideas", Vince said with a smile. "And this was a productive meeting. Maybe you're not a total moron after all."
"Thank you, Daddy... WHAT?"", Steph said.
"I love you, Pum'kin", Vince said quickly.
"All right Daddy", Steph said as she headed out the door. "I'll get the reports you asked for done and everything else. I'll see you later!"
"Bye, darling", Vince smiled as he closed the door.
Vince went back and sat down at his desk, reopening the reports he had been reading earlier.
After a few moments, he stopped and hit the buzzer for his secretary.
"Yes Mr. McMahon", the secretary answered.
"Call the video store by my house and have them set aside the entire series of Police Academy movies for me. I'll pick them up around nine o'clock when I stop by there.", he said.
"Yes sir", the secretary said. "Anything else?"
"No, that's it", Vince said. "Thank you Janice."
Vince smiled as he leaned back in his chair.
"Yeah, tonight is movie night at the McMahon house. Linda is going to be so happy!", he muttered to himself.
And with a big smile on his face, Vince went back to work.
(THE END)...
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