Friday, January 20, 2012

(Retro) Monday Night Raw - August 11, 2003

Live from the Quad Cities on Spike TV
Hosts are Coach and the King

Opening montage and fireworks.....

Here comes Eric Bischoff to the ring - all smiles. He gloats about last week - has the replay showed of him pinning Shane 3 times. He rags on Shane a bit - calls him the Frank Sinatra Jr. of the WWE. Here comes Good Old JR. He's pissed. He's not pressing charges against Kane, but is sueing the hell out of Bischoff for setting him up in an unsafe working condition. Eric tries to kiss ass - telling Coach to leave, so JR can reclaim his spot at the announce table. Here comes Stone Cold. He shakes JR's hand and welcomes him back. He has a contract in his hands - talks to JR in the corner of the ring. JR nods and Austin tells Bischoff that if he'll face a certain person tonite on RAW, JR won't sue. Eric thinks it's Shane, so he agrees and signs the contract. Austin tells Eric to read it first, but Eric signs and says bring on Shane. Austin says it's not Shane - it's Kane. Austin laughs and Bischoff looks ready to cry. That expression - priceless. JR and Stone Cold drink some beer as Bischoff slowly walks to the back.

Whack of the Night: Test interferes - causes Scott Steiner to lose to Randy Orton last week..

Mixed Tag Team Match
Scott Steiner and Stacy Keibler versus Rico and Miss Jackie

Rico mocks Stacy's ring entrance. Funny. Steiner & Rico start off - Rico prances and Steiner just levels him into the corner. Belly to belly - fists - steinerline and elbow by Steiner. Rico flees to corner - tags jackie. She gets in Steiner's face - he tags Stacy. Slaps back and forth - kicks by Stacy. Sunset flip by jackie and she and Stacy roll around - back and forth with several 2 counts. Kicks and chops by Stacy - Rico knees her in the back from the outside. Jackie boots her as Test pops up and pulls Steiner off the apron. A double clothesline lays out both women. Test and Steiner fight out into the audience. Rico nails Stacy from the outside and Jackie gets the pin..
Winners: Rico and Miss Jackie

Steiner is back in the ring - bitches at Test. Makes a challenge for right now - Test says no - next week and the match is for Stacy. Stacy accepts the match..

Ric Flair and Randy Orton are in the back bitching about Steve Austin. Evolution can't interfere or they will be suspended. Here's Triple H talking about the Elimination chamber. Orton says he has Trip's back at SummerSlam. Evolution just rules..

The Kane paddy-wagon pulls up in the back..

Non-Title Match
La Resistance versus The Dudley Boyz

The Dudleys bring a US flag to the ring. La Rez charges the ring as the bell rings. Bubba lands chops on Dupree and the double-team on the French Fries by the Dudleys. TIme for the "Whassupp" - but Dupree comes in with the flag - nails the Dudleys. Ref calls for the DQ..
WInners by DQ - the Dudley Boyz

Dupree breaks the flag in half and they continue to beat on the Dudleys. Sylvian brings in a bottle of wine, and they take turns drinking from the bottle & pouring it over the Dudleyz. Finally, the French Fries take the flag and lay it out over the Dudley's prone bodies.

Coming this Friday - Freddy versus Jason - Winner Kills All...

Molly is shining her Women's championship belt. Here's Golddust. He introduces Molly to a man who's not boring - Lance Storm made up as a mini-goldust.. He reads his Goldust lines form his cue card - messes up - and Molly slaps him. Goldust says it's time for phase 2 - involving something about midgets.. Funny....

HBK is talking with Kevin Nash. They talk junk and both say they're going to win the Elimination chamber. Here's Goldberg. He thanks them for last week, but he's the next World champ.. All three kind of face off...

Booker T's music plays and here is --- Christian. He does all the Booker entrance moves and has his new IC title he won last night. He takes credit for putting Booker out of wrestling and says since it's the debut of Spike TV - he's got a special opponent..

Intercontinential Championship Match
Christian versus Spike Dudley

Spike runs to the ring - it's all Spike. Christian goes to the eyes and lands a knee to the head. Kicks, a back-breaker, and fists. Christian plays to the peeps (both of them) - and Spike tries to fight back. Stretch by Christian followed by a slam and a choke. Spike comes back with forearms and a bulldog - and a spear by Spike. DDT by Spike and he goes to the top. Spike-stomp for 2 as Christian makes the ropes. Vertabreaker by Christian and he gets the pin.
Winner: Christian

The cops release Kane from the paddy wagon. Here's Eric Bischoff. He kisses up to Kane and offers to lay down for him in the ring. Kane says NO!

JR comes to the announce position and shakes hands with Lawler and Coach. Coach reluctantly leaves and JR takes back his spot.

Eric Bischoff versus Kane

Eric slowly walks to the ring. Kane is led down by the cops and released from his chains. Eric prays as Kane climbs into the ring. Eric lays down for Kane. Kane grabs him by the throat and sets him up for a choke slam. He puts Eric down and leaves the ring. Ref counts to 10 and Eric wins by count-out. Kane gets the mic. The people want him to beat Eric's ass, so he won't. He's tired of doing what people want. Here comes RVD. Drives Kane from the ring. A dive to the floor, but Kane moves. He's got a chair, but misses - RVD with a legdrop and to the top for a five-star. RVD misses and hits the chair. Kane gets the chair and nails him again.

Trish is in the back getting ready for her match.

Trish comes to the ring..

Terri talks to Gail Kim backstage. Kim asks Terri where she's been since Kim debuted? She's got the WWE's attention now and is going to show who Gail Kim really is.

Triple Threat - Women's Championship..
Molly Holly versus Gail Kim versus Trish

Trish clotheslines Molly - goes after Kim on the outside. Trish with kick and spinebuster on Kim - Gail with knee - Molly pulls Trish off the ramp - just constant double-teaming on Trish by Molly and Gail. Molly ties Trish up in the Tree of Woe - Gail goes to the other corner and comes running end - slammo - Molly with clothesline on Gail Kim and the cover and pin..
Winner: Molly Holly

Flair and Orton are in the back talking. Here comes Triple H. He's talked to Bischoff. Randy Orton is the special ref for Flair's match against Goldberg tonite. Flair and Trip both playfully chop Orton on the chest - big group hug...

Boot of the Week: Rosey makes Super Hero In Training debut last week..

An old lady is trying to cross the street. Here's Rosey. He helps her across -and she's grateful. Who is he? He's a S.H.I.T.! She hits him with her purse and storms off.. Here's the Hurricane. "No good deed goes unpunished!" Funny!

Eric Bischoff is relaxing in his office. Here comes Steve Austin. Eric is happy till Steve tells him he has another match - the winner of his match against Kane fights Shane McMahon at Summer Slam. And that's the bottom line...

Wrestlemania Recall: Jim Ross makes his Wrstlemania debut in 1993 wearing a toga..

The Huricane versus Rodney Mack

Lawler says Teddy is due back next week. Rodney takes control - works over Hurricane in corner. A slam, kicks,and a suplex. 2 count. It's all about the Mack. A bearhug! Hurricane fights back with elbows and goes for the Hurri-slam. A clothesline by Hurricane and he goes to the top for a flying cross-body press for the pin..
Winner: Hurricane

Rodney attacks Hurricane after the match. Here's Rosey for the save with a chop and slam on Mack. Rosey and Hurricane do a 5-second superhero pose..

Highlight Reel

Chris Jericho talks about the challenge made to Kevin Nash - Nash shaves his head - Jericho shaves his facial hair. Jericho goes on typical ego-rant and practices flicking his hair. Here comes Nash, carrying a briefcase. Nash says Jericho needs a makeover. They show pics of Jericho on the Jerichtron 5000 - Jericho bald, with red mohawk, and with Kid & Play haircut. Funny. Jericho calls Nash "Nash-hole". Talk about the Elimination chamber match and Nash opens the case to bring out clippers. Either Jericho accepts match or Nash kicks his ass. Next week - it's Jericho versus Nash - hair versus Hair on RAW. Jericho tells Nash to leave - Nash starts to leave, but Jericho attacks from behind. Slam and clothesline by Nash and Jericho is on the floor.Nash gets grass-clippers from briefcase - Jericho tries to escape under the ring. Nash pulls him out and Jericho blasts him with a fire extinguisher. Jericho escapes up the ramp.

Ric Flair and Randy Orton are coming to the ring..

JR and the King talk about SummerSlam..

Must Be A Winner - NO DQ - NO Count-Out
Special Referee: Randy Orton

Ric Flair versus Goldberg
(Ric came out to his own old music - whoooo!)

Orton slips Flair some brass knucks as Goldberg makes his way to the ring. Orton and Goldy face off and Flair nails Goldy from behind. 2 count. Flair stomps and chops Goldy. Suplex and more chops. Another quick 2. Goldy is pissed. Kick and a slam. Backdrop and a stiff clothesline. Powerslam and a very slow 1 1/2 count by Orton. Flair kicks Goldy, and Goldy lands a clothesline. Very slow 2 count. Goldy chases Orton out of the ring. Flair gets a chair and nails Goldberg. Goldy grabs both Orton and Flair, but Ric delivers a low blow. Figure Four by the Nature Boy. Goldy makes the ropes, but Orton kicks his arm. Flair keeps working on the legs - Goldy comes back again with clothesline and backdrops on Orton and Flair. Goldy spears Orton. Flair goes to the eyes. Stiff spear by Goldberg - here's HBK in the ring. Shawn gives Orton some "sweet chin music" (and dedicates it to the ladies of DXSI) and Orton is out. A jackhammer on Flair by Goldberg and HBK grabs Orton's arm and uses it to hit the mat three times.
Winner: Goldberg

A good show - The return of JR; Rico is still funny and the Hurricane/Rosey stuff is decent too. What's up with the Lance Storm as Mini-Goldust? This was the best Goldberg match I think I've seen since he and DDP tore it up back in WCW. He was actually selling moves, and Flair carried him to a decent showing. I like the way that WWE is now setting up matches for the next week now as part of their routine. It makes the fan know what to expect and look forward to next week - and I think it helps build the ratings. This show was decent - next week - the return of Teddy Long, Jericho versus Nash - Hair versus Hair , and Test versus Steiner - winner gets Stacy... I'm actually looking forward to it..

I've been thinking on it and I'm expecting Stacy to turn on Steiner next week and go back with Test. They had a good thing going with the Testicles angle - and I like seeing Stacy and Test together.. Besides - I want to see an evil Stacy Keibler.. Good Stacy is OK, but evil Stacy is really hot.. Another good show brought to you by the WWE.

Later all....


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