Wednesday, January 18, 2012

(Retro) WWE Velocity Recap - July 19, 2003

Velocity Recap (featuring the only announcer worse than Coach) - July 19, 2003

This is the first night I've watched Velocity in a long time. And now I understand why. Josh Matthews is OK for an announcer, but Ernest "The Cat" Miller? He makes Coach look like the great Gordon Solie. He just royally sucks. I liked him in WCW when he did the commissioner stuff and all that, but that was 5 minutes at a time. An hour of the Cat, just talking and no dancing - I'd rather get a lap dance from Mae Young. Geez! Anyhow, here's what happened:

THE FBI (Chuck Palumbo and Johnny Stambolli) w/Nunzio versus
Funaki and Spanky
Spanky and Funaki charge the ring, but Palumbo is too much. Spanky tags Funaki and they double-team for 2. Mostly FBI controlling with power moves while Funaki flies around and kicks alot and Spanky uses forearms and kicks. In the end - the FBI go for the H-bomb on Spanky - but he manages to hit Johnny the Bull with the tornado DDT from the top - Funaki get's the cover and the pin. The Winners: Spanky and Funaki

Wrestlemania Recall: Butterbean knocks out Bart Gunn at Wrestlemania 15.

The Basham Brothers w/Shaniquia versus Matt Cappetelli and Johnny Jeter
Before the match, one Basham licks Shaniquia's boot, while the other gets flogged. Doug and Matt lock up - it's all Basham as Matt tags to Jeter. Back and forth - lots of tags by the Basham's. Danny slams Matt's head into the mat repeatedly. Hey Matt - meet mat! The Bashams still dominate with a neck-twist that looks painful. Double-team, but Jeter's breaks it up. More double-teaming by Basham's, but Matt fights back with jawbreaker on Danny. Hot tag to Jeter. Dropkicks everywhere as Jeter flies. Clothesline for 2 count. Here comes Matt with a flying bodypress - chaos ensues and Shaniquia climbs to the ring apron. Ball and gag on Jeter by the Bashams and he's covered for the pin. Winners: The Basham Brothers

Tonite on Confidential : Mick Foley

Replay from Smackdown as Chris Benoit defeats Matt Hardy in US Title Tourney.

Replay of Eddie Guerrero stealing win from Billy Gunn from Smackdown to advance in US Title tourney.

The APA sees Matt Cappetelli and the other Tough Enough 3 Guy (John, I think? I can't remember for sure) in the back and invite them to the APA Invitationial Barroom Brawl at Vengance.

WWE Burn of the Night - Sable and Stephanie cat fight from Smackdown

A-Train versus Orlando Jordon
OK match - A-Train dominated with power moves and kept control most of the match. Jordon would come back with dropkicks and forearms, but the power of the A-Train is too much as he hits the Train-wreck and gets the pin.
Winner: A-Train

Replay of Kurt Angle defeating Big Show and The Worlds Greatest Tag Team on the Smackdown main event.

WWE Rewind; From Smackdown, Jamie Noble offers Torrie Wilson 25 grand to spend the night with him.

Dawn Marie versus Nidia
Nidia comes to the ring and Dawn takes the mic. She taunts Nidia about Jamie Noble's lust for Torrie Wilson. Big charge from Nidia and it's on. Nidia whoops ass until she misses dive into corner. Dawn comes back with clothesline and lots of kicks. Chop-suey-city by Dawn Marie. Dawn screws up and gets tied in the tree of woe. It's all Nidia now as she kicks and stomps away. Dawn comes back with an elbow and cross-body. Big slam by Dawn Marie. Nidia hits a DDT and gets 2. Dawn goes for a roll- up, but Nidia rolls on through and grabs the ropes, getting the pin.
Winner: Nidia

Not a bad show. It's better to watch it with the sound turned down though, cause Cat and Josh are just plain awful. More Cat than Josh, but they both need to go back to announce school. Again, I ask - where is Tony Schiavone when we need him, or even Mark Madden? Anyway - a decent show. Good night all..

-Doug

No comments:

Post a Comment